Comments on: Scholarship Screwup #6: Forget About Family

By: Shammy

Shammy — Sat, 23 Apr 2011 02:28:01 +0000

This makes me feel better. I’ve always thought that as a working parent and student, I was not “active” enough in extra-curricular groups, committees, activities, etc. to really be considered for many scholarships. I know that my role in my family is more important than school groups, but to have someone outline this and to advise not to pass up applying for scholarships is a nice reassurance. Thank you!

By: Chanelle

Chanelle — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 23:48:23 +0000

Out of all the posts I’ve read so far, this is only one that actually makes sense. My mom, who is a single parent, has been out of work for years now. She was the only one supporting me and my brother. He had to take off from college to work full time to pay for school and our bills. I, on the other hand, was looking for work since I turned 14. I finally got one when I was 16 and spent my part of my summer and entire junior working to help out. I had no time for fun like the rest of my friends. My grades even got affected.

Anyway, I do feel as if most of these scholarships only want scholars or students who didn’t have to worry about important social/financial responsibilities.

By: Tracy O

Tracy O — Thu, 03 Mar 2011 04:11:31 +0000

I am so glad you mentioned this. Our own situation is exactly what you were saying. My son has had to help us with my disabled inl-laws for the past nine years. Consequently, there has been neither time or money for him to be involved the extra curriculars that most scholarships want. I have included the information anyway on most of them and was just hoping that it might make a difference to someone. I appreciate the confirmation that you gave me. I have been feeling very guilty that my children have been so affected by this situation and now at least there is hope that it may some how benefit them. Thanks.

By: lilian njambi Kunyiha

lilian njambi Kunyiha — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 05:45:51 +0000

your tips on how to win the scholarship are very encouraging and they have at least shaped my life . keep up the good job.
I do play a very big role in my family as I wake up every day at 5 0clock in the morning to milk our cows and take the milk to the coperative and later I have to cut nappier glass for the cows and give them water before i go to other errands. Also on Saturdays i help my parents in the garden thus a play avery big role in my family. MY father has already retired and now they are doing farming which is not able to feed the family and pay the shool fees for me and my younger brother who is in class seven.

By: lyssa

lyssa — Sat, 30 Oct 2010 08:59:33 +0000

Thank you. How great this scholarship is. In which you value the “family”. My family is very important. Without them I could not watch the beautiful scenery of this world. I am happy that Allah grant me a loving and understanding parents and siblings.My father is a tenant farmer and my mother is a housewife who sell ice candy,peanuts and other native foods in our house. My parents support,guide,share and love us in every day of our life.We become stronger in facing every obstacles, because we don’t forget to pray with Almighty Allah. I am the eldest among my three siblings. I spend my weekends at home and weekdays at school. In weekdays my brother with his bag full of books, he carry an extra styrobox with ice candy to sell it in their school at break time. I know this may drop his self-confidence, but he volunteered to help my parents by selling at school for his allowance. Me as well at our lodging house I fry peanut and pastries to sell at my vacant time. I save the money for my allowances and miscellaneous fees. Every night I make sure that I cooked peanut and packed it,then I reserve the remaining time for studying and answering assignments. Every weekend I go home happy. Happy because I can help my father in the farm as well as I can take care my mother and siblings. I have scheduled my work in our house.
5:00 am – pray
5:20 am – water the plants
6:30 am – cook for breakfast
7:30 am – breakfast time!
8:00 am – wash plate
8:30 am – Clean the house (sweep,scrub,and map the floor)
9:30 am – wash our clothes
11:00 am – fetch water to bath for me,my brothers & for my mother
11:20 am – cook for lunch
12:00 noon – pray
12:20 pm – lunch time!
1:00 pm – prepare the bed of my brother (sleep time)
1:20 pm -sweep the floor
2:00 pm – stroll and sell ice candy in our neighbors with my mom
3:00 pm – pray
3:20 pm – water the plants
4:00 pm – go to farm with my father
5:30 pm – cook for dinner
6:00 pm – pray together
6:40 pm – Prepare for Dinner.
7:00 pm – dinner
8:00 pm – pray
8:30 pm – chitchat with my parents and siblings
10:00 pm – rest time
“huh goodnight!Thanks Allah”.this is usually my main expression with I go to sleep. When weekend at home I really make sure I manage my time in helping them. I actually help my brother in his assignments every night.Then monday comes, I wake up early to cook for breakfast. then took a bath and clean up. then bless and kiss my siblings and parents. I go to school by riding a bus. My parents would give me 400 pesos as my weekly allowance, in which I make it as a capital in by buying peanut and ingredients for pastries then I sell it at our lodging house so that my 400 pesos will increased. Although I earned just enough for my daily consumption. I save 50 pesos per week , so that I can use it in paying our miscellaneous fees. I lodge at the dormitory of our school,because our house is far from our school. So, I am force to rent for lodge. I enrolled in the University Of Southern Mindanao, because it is the nearest school from our house for my college. My youngest brother was forced to stop because my parents income are not enough in paying our tuition in school. But I promise him that I will send him to school If I can finish my studies and can have a stable job in the future. But my problem now is I am threatened to stop this semester because of financial problem. Our enrollment is on November 4 for the 2nd semester. But I can’t enroll because we have no enough money to pay my tuition. Even if my 2nd brother will stop in schooling, and his tuition fee will be fund for my tuition this is still not enough. Please do help me. I really want to finish my studies. I know with your help I can make it. I am begging for your kindness.please. I assure you that I will do good in my studies. I am willing to pay you back just please help me. Thank you and may Allah bless us all.

By: Schandra Madha

Schandra Madha — Thu, 26 Aug 2010 01:51:44 +0000

Thank you so much for these pointers. They’re fantastic. The only thing is… I already do all these things in my application essays that you’re saying to do. No kidding. I really do. I’ve applied to maybe 30 scholarships in the last 3 years or so and haven’t won a single award. Not even a consolation prize. I actually have real hardships (mostly related to my medical condition and my family), huge responsibilities in my household, extra-curricular activities from high school and even outside of high school (volunteering at animal shelters, nature preserves, campaign offices, Goodwill, etc.) I talk about specifically what I want to do in life with my education. I mention how I want to be an ambassador with my Astronomy degree and study with scientists from around the world, building bridges through science that will facilitate peace. I talk about my wish to join the Peace Corp and the Wolf Program in the course of my life. I talk about my People to People Student Ambassador trip to Europe. I mention my work experience and how I saved all through high school and worked in the summers to help my family. I’ve got a pretty high SAT and ACT score and my GPA wasn’t that bad in high school (I was about top 30%). It would have been better if it wasn’t for the complications with my health and family that I detail in my essays. I’m a National AP Scholar, a National Merit Scholar, and I was in National Honor Society. And yet, still nothing. I thought I was doing something wrong until I started reading these Scholarship Screwups. Now it seems I’ve been doing everything right according to you. The only award I have been given was from my university, an academic competiveness grant, that has barely put a dent in my costs. I’m monumentally confused. Please help.

By: Awadallah

Awadallah — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 20:57:30 +0000

hello josh : thank you for your advice and really I understand what’s your points . I agree with you on this one…

By: Mosisa

Mosisa — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 12:22:21 +0000

I reall want to thank you for the advice that also a responsibility in the family is also very important. I would like to give all the credit to how I have successfully recovered from a not so wholesome family life to my immediate family members, and then some (assuming this is what we think of family when we talk about “family,”) but this honestly has not been the case for me. To make a long story short, I’ve lived with at least six different family members from my biological father’s side of the family by the time I reached 16years old, that my immediate family life relationships was anything but smooth, “normal” (in the normal and general sense of what a “normal” family is supposed to be) and, supportive, unfortunately, to honestly say. This is not to say that I was totally abused or neglected by my immediate family. Also, I am not putting blame on any of my family members for the problems that we may have had, either those of which we were aware of, but did not know what to do about them to resolve the issue for whatever reason, or those problems that existed which may be even a part of the day to day daily stresses of living that can cause such family problems in any family unit, whether a healthy and happy one or not, and those somewhere in between. Perhaps this is because I had a step-parent, where there were some awkwardness in the beginning of our relationship to say the least, which therefore provided the preliminary groundwork for the future problems that were not foreseen or predictable at the time, to no one’s fault or even responsibility, now that I look back at my life, where I had a step-parent from the time I was seven years old, and am now middle-aged.

By: Awoke

Awoke — Thu, 20 May 2010 08:03:13 +0000

to be effective do your better!

By: Alapati Tautai

Alapati Tautai — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:59:33 +0000

I agree with you on this one Josh. Family is indeed important than anything. From where I come from, family ties are very important. Over the years, our culture has been influenced by other cultures but at least 70% of the families here still have strong family bonds or ties. There are only four people in my family – my sister, myself, mother, and father. Being that I am the oldest, it always seems like I have more responsibilities around the house. I always find myself trying to balance out my schedule for school work, school games, school activities, help out with my family business, and of course, family chores inside & outside the house. I feel like I do not have time to be a teenager because I have all these things to do. Despite how hard it is, it is actually helping me develop and prepare myself when I am on my own and in college.

By: Esperanza

Esperanza — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 05:57:36 +0000

I would like to give all the credit to how I have successfully recovered from a not so wholesome family life to my immediate family members, and then some (assuming this is what we think of family when we talk about “family,”) but this honestly has not been the case for me. To make a long story short, I’ve lived with at least six different family members from my biological father’s side of the family by the time I reached eighteen years old, that my immediate family life relationships was anything but smooth, “normal” (in the normal and general sense of what a “normal” family is supposed to be) and, supportive, unfortunately, to honestly say. This is not to say that I was totally abused or neglected by my immediate family. Also, I am not putting blame on any of my family members for the problems that we may have had, either those of which we were aware of, but did not know what to do about them to resolve the issue for whatever reason, or those problems that existed which may be even a part of the day to day daily stresses of living that can cause such family problems in any family unit, whether a healthy and happy one or not, and those somewhere in between. Perhaps this is because I had a step-parent, where there were some awkwardness in the beginning of our relationship to say the least, which therefore provided the preliminary groundwork for the future problems that were not foreseen or predictable at the time, to no one’s fault or even responsibility, now that I look back at my life, where I had a step-parent from the time I was seven years old, and am now middle-aged.

So, what has worked for me? Looking back at my life, and how I have survived certain obstacles in my day to day living, I’m glad that I believe in God, and that I had the wonderful support of friends and other friends I met along the way in my journey in life who have now become like family to me because they have become my extended family, in a sense, for me.

From being a terribly asthmatic young child to the point of near death, but a gifted one, to where I over-extended myself with an unbalanced life, and unresolved personal issues with certain friends that paved the way to my breakdown during my last supposedly graduating months to a Bachelor’s degree, where it seemed that my life would forever be dependent upon certain medications for survival, and be necessary to get “over” another day, day in and day out, my life situation has turned for the better, after a certain amount of therapy, coupled with certain medications (of which I am currently and slowly, trying to wean myself off them with the help of a physician and certain vitamins).

Again, to make a long story short, I only lived with my current immediate family which includes siblings, a step-parent, and a biological parent, for only ten years total, from seven years old until seventeen years old, for my own reasons to leave because frankly, I was not happy with my immediate family at the time. Nevertheless, I managed to maintain and get good grades to get into a good college, and maintain a stable job for fifteen years afterwards, but with periodic interruptions in employment, due to small, and minor breakdowns, and problems with my medications. But I persevered and endured through hard work, and it paid off. Now, I’m currently working on my Associate’s degree, and have plans on going to law school, and yes, to try to make the world a better place, for I believe there is a lot of hope for those who are hopeful with their lives, and who refuse to give up on themselves for whatever reason, and for whatever life brings them along their journey in life, for life is a journey, and it is up to us, I believe, where we can go in that journey, provided we have goals to fulfill a dream, any dream, whether big or small, so long as we continue to work at it day by day without stopping until, we die or we simply run out of dreams to dream about. I believed and still believe that as long as we have a dream we wish to fulfill, we continue to want to live, and make better lives for ourselves no matter what obstacles come our way, for even those obstacles can just be stepping stones, and learning experiences that can teach us new things about life or how to live our lives better even in simple and ordinary ways, for I believe that anything we learn and can learn to make our lives better can only make us even more alive and intent on fulfilling whatever goals and dreams we may have in our life, and since each of us is a part of society, this can only enrich society. If any and all individuals are enriched, society is also enriched. It’s like a domino effect, or one that’s contagiously handed down from one individual to another and passed on to society.

By: lilia wustefeld

lilia wustefeld — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:21:09 +0000

i reall want to thank you for the advice that also a responsiblity in the family is also very important.
the daily live is bringing so every little weight on your shoulder as a responsible person wich is not allowing to participate at this group or that group and even worse you feel so bad about especial
then you were so active once. so you are now having responsibilies and their is no applouding crowd for this.thanks ,cause i last week said to myself how should i tell that i am so active here and there if
took the response to be a good mother for three growing up kids.a good daughter to my mum and dad
wich are retired and need now my help and attention.thank you .thank you.

By: Mario Garcia

Mario Garcia — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 02:24:48 +0000

I have never thought of including my role in my family in applications. These advices are an essential contribution to my scholarship’ applications, and I sincerely thank you for helping people like me to achieve our goals.

By: Ashutantang

Ashutantang — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:54:28 +0000

My family will not be a problem for me

By: Ashutantang

Ashutantang — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 08:48:43 +0000

Ok thanks i understand u

By: Bekah

Bekah — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 03:23:36 +0000

Wow! Thank you Judge Josh! My family adopted three boys out of CPS foster care in 2007 (two of which are very special needs). Shortly after the boys were placed with my family, my mom developed Multiple Sclerosis. I was depending on my very high GPA (3.9/4.0) to help earn a scholarship, but after Tip #2 not so much. =) Since the events of 2007, I had to stop almost all of my extracurricular activities in order to help my family. I was concerned that stopping my plethora of résumé-boosting hobbies would hinder my ability to compete for a scholarship, but my family was and is more important. Now, I am attempting to play catch-up my senior year while taking courses at the local college. Your tips are great! Love your humor–it makes it easier to take (especially Tip #2). =)
Have a great night,
Bekah–Former Scholarship Screwup

By: ellen

ellen — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 00:29:51 +0000

that works for me because i havent really had the time for school activies all 4 years so now im playing catch-up my senior year

By: ONEL ZIDOR

ONEL ZIDOR — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 18:12:00 +0000

ok i get you thank you

By: ONEL ZIDOR

ONEL ZIDOR — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 18:11:03 +0000

when you say forget about familly i will never see my famillyand won’t able to talk to them

By: Carolyn

Carolyn — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 21:13:31 +0000

Tell my story–good advise I will try it I can only hope that my life is something worth reading.